Category: What The Fuck

Auto Correct + Old Hashtags = Disaster

This is definitely my most embarrassing auto correct to date…

JB_Autocorrect

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Happy Halloween: Scary Laughs with Ellen

If I had to guess, I’d say that Ellen DeGeneres’ favorite holiday is Halloween! Take a look at Ellen’s epic Nicki Minaj costume this year! I mean… Those boobs!

Ellen_Nicki

 

Furthermore, she gets a rush our of scaring guests on her show throughout the entire year. Take a look at some of her most memorable scares:

There was Taylor Swift.

 

Selena Gomez.

 

Adam Levine.

 

Miley Cyrus.

 

Sean Hayes.

 

Emily VanCamp.

 

Taylor Swift again.

 

And again.

 

And again.

 

And… Again!

 

And the list of guests goes on and on and on.

Of all the people Ellen has scared over the past few years, my favorite, year-after-year, is her writer Amy. Each Halloween, Ellen sends Amy to a haunted house and films her fear. Amy’s reactions are similar to mine always worth a good laugh.

 

Check out Amy’s haunted house adventures from the last four years:

 

2013: Universal Studios Walked Dead Tour

 

2012: Haunted Hallway at Ellen’s Studio

 

2011: The Queen Mary’s Dark Harbor

 

2010: Universal Studios Hollywood Haunted House

 

I hope you enjoyed Ellen’s tricks on Amy as a little treat!

Happy Halloween!

Miley Cyrus’ Tongue is Back!

I don’t know what is going on with Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth, but he needs to give her tongue a hell of a lot more action. That poor sledgehammer.

Check out Miley’s new porno video for “Wrecking Ball” featuring her tongue.

Lady Gaga Too Tired After VMAs To Open Car Door

After Lady Gaga bust her bare ass off on the MTV VMA stage, the absolute last thing she wanted to do was open a car door for herself. 

Makes total sense, right?

Here we see her go in for the grab like a normal person until she realizes

 

“Fuck it, I’m Lady Gaga! I live for the applause… Get that damn door for me!”

lady gaga car door

 

To be fair, she was probably tired from dancing during the entire broadcast…

Lady Gaga VMA GIFs

Lady Gaga VMA GIFs

Lady Gaga VMA GIFs

Lady Gaga VMA GIFs

Lady Gaga VMA GIFs

Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez Hate Miley Cyrus

You have to see this video these GIFs (update: the original video has been removed from YouTube by Viacom).

It’s pretty clear that Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez hate Miley Cyrus. They can’t help but laugh at her tasteless performance, which actually makes me like both of them even more.

Stars, they’re just like us.

 

Taylor’s like… “I can’t. I’m so innocent.”

Taylor Swift Couldn't Handle Miley Cyrus And Robin Thicke's VMAs Performance

 

Then Taylor’s like… “Wait, is she for real?”

Taylor Swift Couldn't Handle Miley Cyrus And Robin Thicke's VMAs Performance

 

Then Taylor, Selena and everyone in the world was like… “Holy fuck! Did she just…?”

Taylor Swift Couldn't Handle Miley Cyrus And Robin Thicke's VMAs Performance

 

And, of course, Rihanna was like… “Bitch is trash.”

 

Check out my Instagram feed on the right for photos and videos from inside the VMAs.

Three Words: Sign Me Up!

Richard Branson, founder of the Virgin Group, announced that Virgin has the technology required to produce the world’s first glass-bottom plane.

Three words… Sign me up! Talk about getting some amazing Instagram photos. Let’s all hope the cockpit remains as is with a traditional floor.

 

Read more about Virgin’s glass-bottomed plane on Richard’s blog.

Spooky Laundry

I found this old, wooden Ouija Board in my building’s laundry room today.

20130811-163433.jpg

I actually own the exact same Ouija Board. It’s been years since I used it and is currently (hidden from my parents) in storage in Maine.

I have no idea where this Ouija Board came from, who it belongs to or why it’s in the laundry room, but that’s some random, spooky shit.